8 Months Off, 2 Months On, 1 Month Off

It's official. I'm going back to work at the end of October.

I know, I know. Many of my female friends, especially the ones in the US and other countries where mat leave is unreasonably short or non-existing, will probably think I'm crazy or ungrateful. After all, we've got a pretty sweet deal here in Canada.

Maternity/Paternity leave in Canada is approximately a year long, during which time the person on leave can receive EI (Employment Insurance, which is one of the many things that were deducted from my pay cheques every month while I was working). Of course, the money one receives from EI is a lot less than one's salary. In my case, the money I receive from EI is a bit less than half of what I was making each month. But at least there's some money (even though essentially it is my money, not some free money from the government).

I was going to take the full-year mat leave and return to work in January 2013, but after much collaboration, Bill and I think it's better that I go back to work earlier.

The reason is that I'm not very good at being a stay-at-home mom. I love Wei and I love spending time with her, but I'm bored out of my mind. As a stay-at-home mom, I'm not very good with getting dressed every day as if I have somewhere to go when I don't. I spend all day in my sweats or PJs with eye boogers on my face and hair all messy. Yes, my poor husband has to live with that. Luckily, he's been so sleep-deprived I don't think he cared (or he did but didn't care to say anything). Moreover, I get no satisfaction out of doing house work (except cooking), so I try to avoid it as much as I can. Subsequently, every day is a bit blurry and "Groundhog Day"ish. I admire those stay-at-home moms who seem so together and graceful. I wish I could be like that, but I'm not.

Also, (Bill often scuffs at this), unlike the usual 9-to-5, my "full-time job" means, on average, 4 hours a day, 4 days a week (and that includes attending weekly meetings). That's the beauty of my job!! Back in the day (like, 20 years ago) when I decided to become an ESL teacher, I specifically wanted the life style: flexible hours, above-average wages, minimal stress, and I can find work anywhere in the world. AND I don't have to be in high heels, be on-call after work, or sit in long boring meetings. I get a new group of students every 7 weeks. With that come frequent new and different challenges to keep me interested.

Finally, we could use the extra money. Living expenses in Vancouver are very high and, once Kai turns 3, we'd like him to take a few classes (music, swimming, and/or soccer). We want to be able to nourish his (and later Wei's) interests without having to worry about our finances. The good thing is that the daycare fees for the 3-5-year-olds are cheaper than the toddlers', so we could use that extra couple hundred dollars to pay for some weekend classes.

My request to return to work has been approved by the Program Manager at the College. Going back to work at this time also has another perk: I teach for 7 weeks, and then we have 3 weeks off for Christmas and New Year's!! So it really won't feel like I've gone back to work completely, and it allows me to ease back into it. Also, I've asked for a morning teaching schedule so I can drop Kai off at the daycare (which is also on campus) before stepping into the classroom and I'll have the afternoon to hang out with Wei, get dinner ready, and pick up Kai at the daycare. As for child care for Wei, my mom can come again in Jan/Feb next year and spend another 6 months with us, as long as her health is okay. The question is who's gonna take care of Wei from the end of October to Mid December? The good thing is, by October, she won't rely on breast milk as much, so anyone can feed her. It would be great if we could find someone to take care of her so Bill can work. If not, Bill could probably watch her while I'm at work.

I feel good about this decision we made. I solely enjoyed the time I spent with Wei in her early months, but now I'm ready to get back in the game. I think it's better for our kids to have an active, content, and happy mommy. Sure, Bill and I will be busier than how we have been, but which family with two kids is not busy? Plus, most of my colleagues are doing the exact same thing, so I have a pretty solid support system here.

I'm excited! If not for the work itself, I'm excited to have a decent income again.